I live next to a fake flower factory. Have you ever heard anything more pathetic in your entire life?
Although determinedly pumping out fake flowers around the clock, that fake flower factory is nowhere near as loud as my next-door neighbors, all delightfully obnoxious and arrogant college students. The ones who own the motorcycles not equipped with mufflers are my favorite, of course. I wish I had a gun and that it was legal to shoot people.
A 13-foot-long Python escaped from its master’s house today, the police warned us. I demonstrated to many people in the office that a 13-foot-long Python is "more than twice as tall as me! Taller than the ceiling!" The police assured us that the Python had recently been fed.
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Lane started kindergarten and Emma is going to a new preschool. Cynda e-mailed an account of their new beginnings and I think everyone else will enjoy them just as much as I did.
Dropping the kids off:
It was Lane and Emma’s first day of school today.  Emma is enrolled in
all-day preschool and Lane went to Kindergarten.  We started the day off
early as it’s a new routine for us to have to eat breakfast before we leave
the house, and Emma of course had some strong opinions on what she WANTED to
wear today vs. what she was GOING to wear today.   It all worked out for the
best and she ended up happy as we headed out the door with plenty of time to
spare. Emma loves her new classroom. She found her cubby and unloaded her
blanket, penguin, and backpack. She promptly found a friend to play with and
went at it. She’s an independent soul. Lane and I made the walk all the way
to the other side of the school where his classroom was so that he would
know how to get back to Emma’s class to meet her at the end of the day. He
then went to the gym to meet with his class until the bell rang for the
start of the day. Holding in the tears was a challenge. And sweet Lane made
sure to give me extra hugs AND kisses (even though it was in front of his
friends) The kids did fabulous, neither one of them had a concern or a worry
in the least, they were so excited. (if you couldn’t tell by the smile on
Lane’s face) They are confident friendly children. I, on the other hand
can’t get over how confident and friendly they are, how grown up they’ve
gotten and how independent they are.
By the time I made it back to Emma’s class for one more picture and one more
hug she had already drawn her teacher a picture.  They are in good hands and
will do well with this and I will get over myself and my emotions.
 
Lane and Emma’s version:
Lane:  They have this huge jungle gym with ropes made of wheat with knots so
you can climb up. I climbed all the way to the top and everyone thought I
was cool.  But while I was climbing Emma came over and hugged me in front of
all my friends. I did not like that very much, tell her not to.
Emma:  Well, I missed you Lane cuz you weren’t in my class.
Lane:  You didn’t miss me. You’re gonna see me after school
Lane:  For lunch we get to walk all the way up to that church – do you see
that mom, you know…pop’s church. me and emma used to go to…we’re gonna
eat lunch up there. (big smile on face)
Emma: yeah and Mr. Lammers (principal) said we’re gonna have applesauce and
milk for lunch YEAH (clapping hands and giggling)
How Lane described himself to his teacher: Lane Edward West. I have 2 dogs
Hunter and Spencer, but Hunter had to go to heaven but Spencer still lives
with us. (They told me Spencer was a cool name for a dog) and I have a
sister named Emma
I don’t know what I was even emotional about. They both did phenomenal. And
Lane did exactly as asked and went from his room and walked all the way
around the school to Emma’s room to meet her. I had done the impatient thing
and went looking for him b/c his class was delayed but I ended up following
him to Emma’s room. He found Emma’s teacher and told her he was there to
pick up his sister. It was the sweetest thing ever. The teacher praised him
for being so responsible.  He said to me..Mom, I thought I was supposed to
pick Emma up, why did you?  (He’s such the big brother)
 
Later on, Cynda told me this cute story:
By the way, I forgot to tell you that I bought Emma some shoes that resemble the Rocket Dog style. Canvas, plaid, tieless, etc.  Anyway she got them b/c they were “like Aunt Sarah’s” and since they’ve become “Like Aunt Sarah’s Rocket Dogs” Now they are just Rocket Dogs.  See my Rocket Dogs – just like Aunt Sarah. 
 
P.S. I wouldn’t really shoot anyone if I had a gun. Just wave it around threateningly, maybe, before being apprehended.
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