for emma

with warmth streaming in through the car window, emma and i eat our ice cream cones and i enjoy the melancholy yellow light on passing fields that beckon us to become nomads. we would wander this nation and all sunny places, listening to “for emma” by bon iver and scaling the seemingly insurmountable challenge of […]

Read More for emma

the wisdom of children

As Michelle is making pineapple juice from a frozen concentrate, I have to question the age of the juice. She dumps it into a pitcher, and I remark at its odd green-brown color. "How old is that?" I ask her. "It’s three years old," Little Ninja pipes in. "We’ve probably had it since we lived […]

Read More the wisdom of children

from bbc

From the BBC: "Monkeys teach their babies to floss with human hair" I am knee-deep in sleep deficit land. I blame my neighbors and work and everyone from high school contacting me all at once. And Evan. My high school bestie visited me with his friend Brittney yesterday. They crashed at my place after we […]

Read More from bbc

next stop, the twilight zone

From the Springfield News-Leader: "With modern-day drivers distracted, Springfield Police have purchased some new sirens that send out vibrations in addition to sound." From Sarah’s Imaginary Newspaper: "Sarah’s Police Department purchases sirens that you can smell and taste. In related news, Police Chief Sarah authorizes the Sarah Sarcasm Task Force."

Read More next stop, the twilight zone

useful curses

Lobbing the usual curses at other people is something I am trying to avoid, e.g. "If I had a sniper rifle at this moment, I would shoot you right in the ear." Instead, I’m thinking of more run-of-the-mill scenarios that are still unpleasant for people who irk me. Which includes most of humanity. "I hope […]

Read More useful curses